| I visited a High School last week and witnessed the | | | | and more emotions. We all tend to experience similar |
| following interaction in the reception area... | | | | emotions but there is a wide variation in how we |
| Parent: 'I have come to pick up my daughter. | | | | express them. Our angry parent expressed herself in |
| Receptionist: 'What's her name?' | | | | an angry manner but what emotions might be driving |
| Parent: 'You should know, you contacted me' (said | | | | her anger? Might she feel fear that her daughter may |
| with an angry tone of voice). | | | | be excluded from school, embarrassment that she has |
| Receptionist: 'I didn't call you!' | | | | been 'exposed' as a 'bad' parent, or frustration |
| Parent: 'Well, somebody here did.' | | | | because she does not know what to do with her |
| Receptionist: 'Well, it wasn't me.' | | | | daughter's behaviour? She might not even be aware |
| Whilst this interaction was taking place the receptionist | | | | of the emotions which are driving her anger. |
| wrote out a Visitors Pass and pushed it across the | | | | Unfortunately for staff, the only evidence of these |
| desk so hard the parent failed to catch it and it landed | | | | strong emotions at play is usually the anger they |
| on the floor. I was expecting an onslaught from the | | | | witness. However, anger is only the tip of the |
| parent at this point. Fortunately, her daughter came into | | | | emotional iceberg and it 'tells' us that the person is |
| the reception area and the parent's focus was | | | | angry but not WHY they are angry. |
| diverted. | | | | So what do we do? Firstly, raise your game when you |
| When the parent had left I enquired from the | | | | realise you are dealing with an angry customer. |
| receptionist if this type of interaction was common. All | | | | Convey through your use of words and body |
| too common, she replied, particularly from parents who | | | | language that you are serious about helping them. |
| have been requested to attend school regarding their | | | | Don't react to their baiting (unlike the receptionist). Take |
| child's behaviour. 'They tend to come in all guns blazing!' | | | | a deep breath before responding, to deal with your |
| Dealing with the same type of complaint or situation is | | | | own adrenalin rush. Seek to find out what has |
| common to almost anyone who deals with the public. | | | | happened. Acknowledge the emotions involved ('I |
| It's understandable to forget or ignore that, for the | | | | appreciate you feel strongly about this'). |
| complainant, their complaint is unique. Their anger can | | | | We can only work at understanding the emotions |
| be compounded by an attitude that 'we have heard | | | | involved if we are calm and take some time to listen |
| this all before'. Handling every complaint in the same | | | | and understand the feelings and situation driving the |
| way ignores the fact that there are many different | | | | customer's behaviour. When we take this approach |
| reasons underpinning what appears to be the same | | | | and put in the time, we can begin to understand and |
| angry outburst. | | | | respond to emotions in a more meaningful way. |
| Consider what drives behaviour: emotions, emotions | | | | |